Tunnel of Love [sample]
by Charles L. Mee
A woman stands, facing front.
A man steps in front of her,
his back to the audience
and begins to throw himself repeatedly to the floor
in front of her.
After a few minutes,
she throws herself to the floor, too.
But she does it only a few times,
finally standing up,
looking at him,
and turning around and walking away,
leaving him to go on until he is exhausted.
Then 6 guys line up at front of stage
with their backs to audience
while 6 women dance for them
lonely, sad unison dance
while a soprano sings.
A woman is lying on the floor.
A guy leans down and locks lips with her
and raises her from the floor into a flamenco-like dance
with lips permanently locked in a kiss
they go on and on and on and on and on
until he passes out and falls to the ground in a heap
she turns to another guy and locks lips with him immediately
and they dance
but she stops them, interrupts the dance
to tell him he is dancing the wrong way
they lock lips and dance again
she stops to correct him again
until she spins around, grabs the sleeve of his shirt
and rips it
then he is pissed
they argue and argue and argue and argue and argue
till the guy turns front and takes a dance posture
and flexes his bicep
he flexes his bicep to the music
5 guys join him in bicep flexing dance
all in unison
then they all do a hip thrust
then turns upstage and wiggle their butts
(not SO macho)
they move through other male display dance moves
then three women step up and do the same male display moves
another thing to steal:
a guy spins a top on the stage
then he flings himself down on the stage
and spins like a top, too,
on his back, side, etc etc
deafening music kicks in.
Purcell or Lully.
And the scene explodes:
six convertibles made of pink vinyl,
like the soft sculptures of Claes Oldenburg,
It is a wedding parade.
The bride and groom step out of their car
They are joined by the rest of the cast, who dance, too.
And, if the music is not Purcell or Lully
but some song with lyrics,
then it may be that the entire cast sings while they dance.
And that sometimes,
while the wedding couple dances,
the rest of the cast stands facing forward
A guy comes in wearing a medieval costume,
riding on a horse on wheels,
accompanied by a drummer.
Celebratory wedding guests.
Another guy, wearing a wet suit with suspenders,
and holding a wash tub around his waist
with a shower head over his head
carries a placard saying: Don Quixote.
Another guy wears a crown of flowers
and struts proudly around.
Another guy is
sitting on the shelf above the tank of water,
when we hear a loud bang,
and the shelf opens suddenly
and the guy falls into the tank of water.
Of course, he gets out of the water,
and climbs back up on the shelf,
and this happens over and over.
There are accordions everywhere,
probably playing really badly.
oiled head to toe,
enter and wrestle.
Wedding guests at a party.
A Comedie Francaise actor in full eighteenth century garb
declaims a speech from Moliere
and fences with an enemy
while another guy sings a song.
A guy sings a love song into a mike
while wearing a roller blade on only one foot
going in circles.
How far can this go?
A few 20 foot tall puppets?
Dinosaurs on stilts?
Six dancers with horses' heads or donkeys' heads?
A guy in a halloween costume
with a green long-nosed head
and an orange silk scarf coming out of its nose?
A guy with a mask that looks like a monster
out of the Ramayana?